How long has it been since I’ve written you? Sorry for that. It seems like anytime things are going right in my life, I tend to ignore you, but when it all starts to crumble down again, I come crawling back to you. Well, you’ve guessed it! I’m not the happiest person at the moment, but I should be. Shouldn’t I? I can’t say much because I think they may be on to us… but you already know all about them. Those silly muggles. They’re great, don’t get me wrong, but… but it’s just not the same. It’s actually better this way I think, but now I’ve lost more than I’ve gained even though my loss is definitely fewer in numbers than what I’ve gained. You understand, right? Of course you do. You always do. Maybe it’s the quantity of them that made the loss seem so huge… but I guess if they really cherished you the same, none of this would have happened? Right? Right. Well you know how I feel about those kinds of situations. I’d rather lose them than have them acting the way they currently are. Again, don’t get me wrong, I’ve never been happier… said the boy who cried wolf. Why did it have to come now? Of all times! I was perfectly fine ‘til you hit me right in the face, knocked the wind out of me, and took away my… my… what did you take exactly? Ah yes, that. Well I worked so hard to build myself back up, and I’m slowly going back, but I won’t let myself. I won’t let you. You’re just another rock in my shoe and they’re just some thorns on my rose. This is actually quite funny because I’ve never been happier, but here I am… writing to you, when the only time I write you is when I’ve been upside down and worn out. Don’t worry though. Only time will tell.

Sincerely,
You.

I told my little nephew to do his homework and he called me Kim Jungun and proceeded to yell, “Go eat dog you dictator!” Well then…

Today I was able to see my family for an hour as they stopped by UCSD on their way home from Sea World. Even after not seeing their faces for about 3 months, I felt like nothing had changed… It was such a happy, yet nostalgic and surreal moment.

My eldest sister, Donna:
You are so beautiful and every time I look at you I am reminded of the times when you used to take care of me as I was growing up. You have always been a second mother to me and the amount of love I have for you is unexplainable. You have always had my back and supported me on all my decisions, and for that, I am grateful to have you as my older sister. I’m so sorry for all the times I was a little brat and when I would say I liked Corina better than you. Honestly, you’ve always been the person I look forward to sharing my new experiences with and just the fact that I get to be with you makes me happy. I love you so much and you’re constantly on my mind.

My older sister, Corina:
Even though I didn’t get to see you today, I saw Caiman and everything about him reminds me of you. Like Donna, you’ve always been there for me and supported me in all my life decisions. I felt like I related more to you because we were closer in age, but as I grow up I realize we have very different mentalities. We are both young and have many dreams, but I’m so proud to call you my sister. Everything you have accomplished makes me want to strive harder in my studies so I can be as successful as you. If there is one person who has never doubted me, it would be you. Thank you so much for all the help you have given me in high school and now in college. I still remember the days when you would come home from college and bring me back a Gameboy game. I love you so much and you’re my inspiration to succeed in life.

My nephew, Edward:
Though I am your uncle, you are more of a brother to me. We grew up together; did everything together. We got our first Gameboys together, played our first Pokémon games together, even went to school together. You probably understand me more than anyone else. I know we used to fight over silly things when we were younger, but today we couldn’t be closer. I love how I’m able to be myself around you and just be a kid again. I know you were always compared to me growing up and were always pushed to follow in my footsteps, but I just want you to know that I will support you in anything you want to pursue in life. Sorry for setting such big shoes for you to fill. I know you try so hard in school, but remember I will always have your back if things do not work out. I love you so much and I’m proud to have you as my nephew; my brother.

My nephew, Romeo:
For ten years it had just been me and your brother, and then you came into our lives. I watched you grow up from a baby to this little 3rd grader who thinks he knows everything about anything. I’m constantly being told that you resemble me most out of the family; looks, personality, grades, and uniqueness. Already at a young age you have become so smart and knowledgeable about countless subjects. Seriously, I didn’t even know half the things you did when I was a kid. I’m so proud of the person you are maturing into, and I know you’ll do great things when you’re older. I fear you may even go beyond what I will do. I know I may be hard on you because I’m your uncle, and you may think I’m mean most of the time, but you’ll thank me in the future. Mine and your relationship is not much different from mine and your mother’s. I love you kid. Keep making me proud.

My nephew, Caiman:
Out of all four of my nephews, you are the one I baby the most. Every time I’m with you, I just want to hug you. Though you are already 5 years old and not really a baby anymore, I can’t help but reveal my soft side for you. You resemble your mother so much that I start to tear up when I think of you. At such a young age you know so many useful skills that most kids don’t learn until they are much much older. I’m proud of the way your parents are raising you, and I know you’ll be one hell of a student and athlete. I can’t wait to watch you grow up. I love you so much J.

My nephew, Rocco:
Rocco, you are the last of my nephews. You are the baby boy of the family and you are so precious. Though you are just a baby, I can feel how lovable and caring you will be. You are so cute when you call me uncle and try to mumble “I love you”, and I just want to be the best role model I can be. I want you to grow up and look up to me as your inspiration to fulfill your ambitions. By the time you are ready to make your own decisions, you’ll have me to support you 100%. I can’t express how much love I have for you because you are just a baby, but you are so special to me. I know your parents, brothers and cousin will raise you well.

My brothers-in-law, Eddie and Giovanni:
Though we are not blood related, you two are as real as any brothers I could ever have. You two have watched my grow up and have taken care of my sisters with love and endearment. You two have even provided me with four nephews that I cherish so much. Thank you for always being there for me and supporting your families and my family as well. You two mean a lot to me, and I don’t know what I would do without brothers like you. Thank you.

I know none of you guys will ever read this, but I’m just so happy to have such a wonderful family as you guys. I know we may have our ups and downs, but what family doesn’t? I love how we all support each other and make decisions for the family as a whole. Thank you for always supporting me and my goals, and I know they may not always be “normal” or cheap, but I really do appreciate everything you guys do for me. I love you guys so much and I wish I had more time to spend with each and everyone of you before I move away again.

Lately I’ve had a lot on my mind and I need someone to talk to… No, I need someone to listen to me as I talk to them about everything. I’m tired of hearing people’s opinions, or ifs, or buts… I just need someone who won’t judge.

I don’t have anything to hide or am I depressed, I just feel like talking to someone who cares. There are so many negative people in this world, and I need someone who can relieve my stress and just be there for me. You know?

Dear Mom and Dad,
보고 싶은 어머니, 아버지께,

I wouldn’t be where I am now without your love and support. Thank you for everything you have done for me. I love you so much, and again, Happy Parents’ Day! 많이 많이 고마워요. 난 사랑해.

사랑하는 아들 태주 올림

I used to complain how boring it was living in my hometown and how there was nothing to do. Then I moved and I eventually got used to my new environment and the cycle repeated. Maybe it’s not the place that’s boring, maybe it’s me that’s boring or the people I associate myself with.

Instead of sitting around complaining, I decided to set a new goal for myself. Whenever I’m bored, I will just find something “not boring” to do. Maybe I’ll start a new TV show, watch a new movie I would never think of watching, buy a new book to read etc. because I realized life is only boring if you make it boring.